Introducing the SolarWinds^© THWACKart^™

Be the envy of everyone as your jet your way to the data center to tackle that latest down system alert. The THWACKart is the fastest way to get to any destination. This overly customized kart is so powerful, it’s banned in 3 countries, and requires specific state, city, and local ordinances.

Just in time for spring! You know have your chance to be the envy of the data center by owning your very own THWACKart! This sleek, stylish, mode of transportation will have you setting land-speed records as you respond to the latest batch of alerts; great or small.

Custom-designed by IT professionals like you, the 1.2 liter, four-stroke engine promises to ensure your alert response latency is sub-10ms.

Continue to customize it to meet your needs with optional features directly from the manufacturer:

• In dash, USB-to-Serial Connector with 1-, 3-, 6-meter lengths
• Underlight LED kit for RGB lighting (Programmable)
• Laptop stand for all your crash-cart needs
• Top-mount two-digit, digital speedometer (max speed display capped at 88 mph)
• Andoid Auto and Apple Carplay capability (Alexa Auto forthcoming)

Testimonials

"Once I got clearance from NASA, this thing got me to the emergency in record time. I was moving so fast in the data center, I couldn't tell the hot aisle from the cold aisle! Thanks SolarWinds!" — George "Rocket" Robinson

To donate to the George Robinson memorial fund, please click here.

The Fine Print

• Due to shipping costs, health and safety requirements, and our legal department, this purchase is only available in the United States and may require registration with the National Nuclear Safety Administration, National Aeronautics & Safety Administration, and your local municipalities.
• Release and quit claim contract upon delivery requiring adult signature for release. Does not conform to California Air Resourced Board requirements and will require installation of three catalytic converters. Is not valid for use in residential, commercial, industrial, urban, suburban, rural, dessert, mountain, tundra, or marshland areas.

The Finest Print

• Happy April Fool's Day to Everyone!